Nikki's Survey...

I saw this, so I figured it'd help answer questions you havent even asked yet!

x: name = Aaron

:x: piercing = Tongue and ears 4 times.. 2 each side…

:x: tattoos = none. I haven’t found something I want to keep for the rest of my life…

:x: height = 6’2”

:x: shoe size = 11 1/2

:x: hair color = Dark brown...

:x: length = short.. just enuff to grab…

:x: siblings = None.. Only child…


LAST...
:x: movie you rented = Moth man Prophecies

:x: movie you bought = Italian Job

:x: song you listened to = Ani Difranco – Rush Hour

:x: song that was stuck in your head = Moving in Stereo by the Cars

:x: cd you bought = (New) Family Tree (Self Titled)

:x: cd you listened to = RATM – First Cd… The first one’s always rawk the hardest…

:x: person you've called = Tory

:x: person that's called you = Jamie

:x: tv show you've watched = Adult Swim

:x: person you were thinking of = Richard

DO...

:x: you have a bf or gf = nope

:x: you have a crush on someone = Yes, but I doubt it will ever become of anything…I’m unlucky like that..

:x: you wish you could live somewhere else = hell fucking yes (Ditto) Like Amsterdam or Ibiza

:x: you think about suicide = I do when I wake up with a hangover…

:x: you believe in online dating = What’s that? If you mean meeting someone off the internet, sure.. but dating them… that’s scary.. lol

:x: others find you attractive = Before or after the Jeager and redbull?

:x: you want more piercings = Sure, I need more holes in my body… labret, gage the ears, septum, eyebrows.. the works! And put a railroad spike through my jank while you’re at it.. Ladies like the spike, right? Right?

:x: you drink = If you could call it that… I drink heavily on occasions with company…

:x: you do drugs = they do me.. and leave a phone number…

:x: you smoke = yes, but not crack.

:x: you like cleaning = I love to clean.. it makes everything so nice afterwards… and it smells good too!

:x: you like roller coasters = With a passion.

:x: you write in cursive or print = P R I N T

:x: you carry a donor card = yes, give my heart to the needy, stevie wonder can have my eyes, and the deaf can have my ears.. as long as they don’t mind the size..

FOR OR AGAINST...

:x: long distance relationships = Ummm.. Depends on the relationship…

:x: using someone = No.. unless they are using you too.

:x: killing people = Only if you have to eat them afterwards.

:x: teenage smoking = What would they do with all the free time?

:x: premarital sex = ok.. just not in West Virginia.

:x: driving drunk = No.. but legal in West Virginia.

:x: gay/lesbian relationship = Love is love.. face it.. get over it even. Let the people enjoy sodomy in the privacy of their homes.. Sheesh…

FAVORITE...

:x: food = Pasta of all types.

:x: song = Wish you were here by Pink Floyd

:x: thing to do = Sleep… and snuggle…

:x: thing to talk about = music and writing…

:x: sports = Rally racing, Mountain Bike racing, Snowboarding, X-games…

:x: drink = soda: Ummm.. Mountain dew and Jeager…

:x: clothes = Chords, cotton, Hoodies.

:x: movies = Anime, porn, Anime porn is twice as nice! Ummm.. Usual Suspects/Heat type movies…

:x: band/singer = Soul Coughing/M. Doughty

:x: holiday = My Birthday

HAVE YOU...

:x: ever cried over a guy/girl = Yes.. Stupid me.

:x: ever lied to someone = Of course… Ever been asked the ‘Do these make my ass look big?’ question?

:x: ever been in a fist fight = Yes.. this guy was beating on his wife and I ended up punching him out.

:x: ever been arrested = yeah… I’m a bad person with bad herbs doing bad things to bad people… bad bad bad…

FAVORITE...

:x: Disney movie = Finding Nemo or Lion King

:x: scent = Clean towels…Drakkar and leather

:x: word = Simmerdowngnaw

:x: nickname = Dank, Dankster, Mojohoho, Airhead, A-ron, A-rod, Air, Roni, Frank the tank, Old Blu, Drunk Bastard, burner, Sir Smokes a lot, Bong boy, Music Munkey

:x: eye color = Green

:x: flower = Rose

:x: piercing = Monroe

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE...

:x: pretty = No.

:x: funny = Only if I make you laugh.

:x: friendly = Quite… outgoing too.. I seem to get along with most anyone…

:x: amusing = Umm.. to watch from a distance maybe…

:x: ugly = No.

:x: loveable = Very. Very. Very….but I guess I’m just biased.

:x: pessimistic = Sometimes.
:x: optimistic = Most of the time

:x: caring = Very much so..

:x: sweet = You’d get a cavity…

RANDOM...

:x: Spell your first name backwards : noraA

:x: The story behind your user name: I used to be Mr. Mojo Risin since I was a huge doors fan.. lost it to AOL TOS.. arg.. So I went to Dankmojo.. that lasted for about two years.. someone ganked it so I couldn’t use it again.. So I became DankMojoJojo.. mainly for I love the Power puff girls.. and Mojo Jojo espically… he slays me.. So hence.. from that day, and that day forth.. and ongoing since that day… of days of ongoing.. I have been… DankMojoJOJO!!!

:x: Are you straight?: I love a woman’s body… I love the imperfections.. I love the noises and juices it makes.. I love the smell, the taste, the feeling, the pulse, the rhythm, the musk, the stains, shapes, the curves and the pure essence of a woman… so yes.. I’m straight...obsessed.

:x: 3 words that sum you up: Gemini, Lover, Poet.

WHO or WHAT (was/is/are) -

:x: In my mouth = A bowel.

:x: Fetishes = Snuggling, Kissing, Leather, Light Bondage.

:x: Person you wish you were with = Sarah Mac or Ani DiFranco

:x: Something you're looking forward to in this up coming month = A new job…

:x: Something that you are deathly afraid of? = big spiders and war

Oh.. by the way.. just so you know... I'm crazy... Crazy as hell in fact.. the fact that I'm allowed to cross the street is proabbly a bad thing...

and sorry to come off so depressed latly.. there's been alot going on...

as for pictures and stuff... that'll come soon enough as I figure out what all to do... I'm pretty good with computers... Pretty lost when it comes to HTML...but that'll change here soon enough as I get some more time to learn...

You ever been with someone who’s shady? Like you have trouble believing them once you catch them in a lie? Like you start having creeping doubts and suspicions after you’ve caught them… You didn’t before, since you were trying to keep an open mind.. but after that.. it’s like Red Flag city…Christ.
She’s been through a lot.. A miscarriage, a jilted lover, a ton of lies, dealing with her kid, having to move back with the folks, a smoldering addiction, a recent breakup of a long distance relationship… I know I should be understanding about these things.. I’ve been through all of them myself… well.. She likes to complain about them, instead of solve the situation… so for some reason, I can’t ignore the signs. I’ve tried to overlook these, but these are all screaming for me to just run away and don’t waste your time on someone with so many problems.. they will only stress you out… I’ve kept my chin high, since I know there are people more deserving of my time and love… but I don’t want to seem cold and tell her all the reasons I can’t be with her…

I’ve only been with her for about 2 weeks now, and already the lies have begun.. She came off as uber-cool, but now… Hell.. I try to avoid her when I’m happy. I could have worked through it, If I really wanted to.. but red flags this early is just a sign that it’s not going to work… I’m over putting 2 years into someone just to have them run off with my heart and time. I guess I’m just picky when it comes to that.. I mean I have my own set of problems as it is.. but I’m not gonna stress it, everyone does..and it makes us human.. So that’s at least why I kept her as a ‘friend’… I don’t think someone you’ve seen naked will ever be truly defined as a friend, but it’s better than just cutting her out of my life as it is…

It’s sad when you think you’ve found that someone.. Someone you connect with musically.. which is a big turn on to me.. Tell me you love soul coughing and you’ve just pressed my shiney red button… and I get all twinkle toed and giddy… Tell me you like Keller Williams and LOVE the solo stuff by M. Doughty.. and I fall on my face in love.. :: Sigh :: and it’s rare too… crazy to say and see.. I know.. but it’s true.. someone from my own taste tribe is a rare find, since I seem to have the strangest tastes in the world… I’ve only found 3 women in my life that have even come close to that taste in music… and it’s sad to say that I look for that in a relationship.. since most people are just happy with someone there.. I’m happy with someone who’s there who knows the music I do.. hence why I’m so bummed about her not being cool..
We had soooo much in common on musical grounds… but the problems just overshadowed that.. well.. that and the lies.. those really urked me.. but hell.. as they say, there’s more fish in the sea… guess I’m not that good of a fisherman… What would Jesus do? Get a net? Trap them in a creek? :: Sigh :: Maybe I need better bait…like a platinum card with 21% APR and a car that has buried me in debt up to my eyeballs..
It's a big old goofy world… - (John Prine)

My wish list...

I wish I didn't always feel so alone...I wish that people could understand me...I wish I was in love..I wish I knew what to do...I wish I knew what to write...I wish I knew how to make your life part of mine...I wish I didn't fuck up everything I touch... I wish I wasn't the asshole I ma.. I wish I was someone else..I wish I didn't have to see another girls gone wild commercial.. I wish my girl would go wild... I wish that sexuality in the us of a wasn't so anal retentive and stressed... I wish I was on a different planet.. I wish I could fly.. I wish I was drunk.. I wish I was asleep.. I wish I was Flying drunk while I was asleep...I wish we all could get along...I wish I could hang out with my dad more.. I wish I knew my mom.. I wish that the would was as happy as I remember when I was a kid... I wish I had a bank account.. I wish I had a car... I wish I was on a road trip.. I wish I could meet new people... I wish the friends I had in High school would show back up... I wish I wasn't born Aaron Howard.. I wish I was born a cat..

Well today was good.. as most days are.. no matter how bad they are.. they could always be worse..

I didn't really remember my dreams today.. but I figure thats because I only slept for like 5 hours.. I tried to stay up all night and day.. and failed around 2pm.. arg... It's nice when you go to sleep like that tho.. you're just soooo drowsy.. that crawling into bed is better than an orgasm.. the soft caress of the sheets, the softness of the pillow.. just all these things culminating in you passing the hell out.. No thoughts in your head.. just devine slumber. I love sleep as you can tell... I have wicked awesome dreams.. Like movies.. I've even had a few with opening credits.. awesome.. Acually, that was the inspiration for me to write a screenplay.. I doubt it'll ever get bought.. but I still did it for the lesson in writing... I do allot of journal writing latly.. mainly it's because I have the free time and am very introspective. I've been searching for myself for the last couple of years..
I avoided it when I lived up at snowshoe, wv with being an alky.. but now that I don't drink anymore.. I've gotten alot clearer of focus.. I'll proabbly never drink like that again.. it was like a winter of college frat parties with coke heads and country bumpkins..quite surreal.. I did meet alot of cool people up there.. Sad to say, alot have just dropped contact.. but I know how it is to travel and talk to people you knew when you were someplace.. only a few people really feel a connection anymore after you leave..
I've spent a considerable amount of time writing poetry.. so I guess that I don't do it as much anymore just makes it better.. I don't feel inspired to write. Like it has to be emotional for me to get the inspiration to write something edgy.. I guess.. I don't know anymore.. I write stuff that I love one minute and hate the next.. it's really a sad cycle with me.. I can't stand to read my old work, since I see so many flaws in it, but in the same tone, I look and see a work that was a bubble of time for me.. so I don't want to taint it by messing with it... I dunno.. maybe it's just such a daunting task to reedit another 1000 poems.. I'd rather just delete it all and start from anew.. maybe thats why I like blogs so much.. you can just see the stream of life flowing.. how someone lives.. how they think.. those emotions that they hide on a blog locked away on someone's moniter... freedom of sorts...

I have a strange style of writing.. much like I'm just talking to you.. So sometimes it's a real easy read.. and sometimes... it's not. see if this is for you...

So here's a little background...

I'm 28 years old.. been writing and singing (badly I might add) for the last 15 years.. I've been working as a bartender for the last 3 years.. Well.. bartender/waiter. depending on the place... I've been a jack of all trades most of my life.. since I move on to something else once I get bored with it.. which is really the story of my life... Ever since I was a kid, I've found there's allot of things I love.. but that love fades after time.. grows stagnate and then I find something else to love.
I've traveled allot.. I've been up and down the eastern seaboard.. I've lived in California (SF and SD), Lived in Reno, NV, Fairhope, Ala, Pittsburgh, PA, Islamorada, FL Key... as well as Virginia Beach/Norfolk VA where I was raised and trained to be a nice little consumer. My favorite place to live was SF.. mainly for the scene of music, art and writers.. I got to do allot of traveling and it's one of my true loves in life other than Sleeping and Writing ..oh.. and add snowboarding and mountain biking to that list of loves as well...
I've had all sorts of jobs.. I've been a jack of all trades.. I've been a On-Air DJ at a radio station, a manager of a pizza joint, a janitor, opps, Custodian (Dick!),
a cook, a delivery driver, a soundman (Worked with over 300 bands...even DMB a dozen times!), a male dancer (Homeless and hung with a strap on while someone's grandmother stuffed a 20 in my g-string and groped me), a waiter/bartender (I'm good at personal service), a 'can you hear me now?' tester for Sprint and At&T, a lawn service technician (Sounds glamorous doesn’t it?), a plumber, a construction worker, a car stereo tech/troubleshooter & Custom work, a driver, a songwriter, a writer of editorials, a troubleshooter for Windows, a salesman (Of frozen meat none the less)... there's allot more.. but I'll just post my resume for a laugh here...
I love allot of things in life.. to cook for others, to talk to new people, to meet new people.. to laugh... I spend allot of time online doing just that.. looking for new and interesting people to talk to.. I've met quite a few.. but I find I make the best friends when I'm on an adventure. I still talk to my high school sweetheart.. and I even still talk to friends I've met in passing at several places in my life.. they are my circle of friends that really help me out when I'm down.. which is pretty often of late.. Since I'm not really doing that much that is exciting or tangible to me.
I've been in alot of relationships.. Hence why I think I can give great advice on them... I've seen the games people play.. I've seen people say things they never meant.. and besides.. if you really listen to what people say.. You can see a side of them that even they don’t know they are showing.. and odds are, they don't want people to see that side of them.. I’m a Gemini.. So I'm supposed to have two sides, right? Wrong.. I have like 4 sides to me.. hell.. lets just make it six for all you Craps players and D&D addicts out there.. I wake up, roll the dice and see what kind of day I’m going to have... Generally I very nice.. I don't tend to bitch and moan about things in life.. but I tend to ramble allot about them on blogs and journals.. I speak openly about my problems.. because.. hell.. I figure it's the best thing to do to get them out on page, where I can grasp at some straw of an answer reading it back to myself.. not to mention.. it's a great way to know my pet peeves.. which I'll go into later. If you want a number of women I've been with.. I'd tell you.. but then I'd have to kill you. Because.. we all know.. no matter what the number.. if it's more than 5 people.. You're a slut.. if it's less.. You want to know why I'm so picky or why I hide from love.... I adore love.. I adore how it makes you happy when the chips are down.. how It lifts you up where you belong... how it just seems to be the real goal in life.. to find someone who completes you.. body and soul... I wish you luck on this journey of love.. since we seem to think of love as something tangible when it's really just a fleeting emotion that comes on the whims of our fancy.. You might find someone to love, but they might not love you... So beware weary traveler.. it's a long trip and you're not even packed.

My childhood was a train wreck in progress.. I was raped when I was 5 by my male babysitter.. and then molested a few times by family friends.. Beat by my mom for being a hyperactive demon child. My dad was a stoner and my mom was a coke head. two junkies who thought they could raise a kid in this junkie world... so in turn, they made another junkie...I dealt with the drama and social service workers and saw the system for what it really is.. A cycle of making something bad. worse. So I'm pretty anti system after being sent to a boarding house, a camp for deranged teens (raped here too) and a mental institution that wanted to keep me there until I was 21. Whew....my dad didn’t think I deserved to be raised in a mental hospital, for which he's my own personal angel.. he saved me a life of mind numbing drugs and sex offenders with a life raised by my grandparents who tried their best to spoil me and show me love that I never really knew from my Mom... I thank god I had someone to take care of me and show me about life.. I mean, I didn’t have a childhood.. so in many ways I still relive my childhood.. be it a trip to the toy isle or through the laughter of little kids.. I love kids.. just because if they don't see the dark side of life, they think it's still wonderful when they are adults.. and no one should have to be shown the dark side of life, or have to deal with the demons I put to rest.


People-wise, I find I can stick to people who are stable and honest.. I'm not much for the drama queens or people who just seem to talk shit about people and cause problems. I'm a Gemini, if your into those kind of things.. I'm not really.. I mean I see allot of truth in what someone can say about someone just by their sign, but I don’t really look too deep into it.. I'm more along the lines of human behavior. I love to watch people and body language.. I looked deep into being a psychologist until I realized they might actually notice I was crazy too.. Well, at least I think I'm crazy.. since I find humor in most things no one finds funny.. I laugh out loud at stupidity.. I tell people the truth...I wasn’t always like this... I used to be a cocky arrogant asshole.. I'll be the first to admit.. I've always been an outsider.. I was the kid in high school dropping acid and wearing a black trench coat jamming out to Hendrix and NIN... Life is dirty, fuck soap...it won't get you that clean on the inside. So I get along with anyone who gets along with me. I'm honest like that and I'll be the first to tell you that you're an asshole.. even if you are my best friend.

I love people who whine about their problems.. Like they have problems... I think of myself as an inspiration that bad shit can happen to people, but you don't have to use it as a crutch to make other people feel sorry for you. I don't feel bad about what happened.. I mean it sucks.. but shit happens. so suck up and trudge through another day.. and be nice.



I wish I could just crystallize my life into a bubble for you to see all the knick knacks I have running around in my life at the time.. but I guess I'll just have to settle for these meager words... My life is fucked. Always will be. at least to me.. Music is my one true happiness. but somehow... somewhere life goes on.. and wither I’m here or away.. We'll make it through another day. Maybe you'll find inspiration out of my sad tales.. or maybe you'll send me hate emails. Maybe you'll find something that makes you laugh and cry.. maybe.. just maybe.. you'll see the world from my eyes.

So I guess from now on.. my life’s an open blog….

Well these are the days of sharing and blogs, right? You want to see the internal ramblings of a poet? This is the right place.. a place where I can ramble and if you dont like it, you can just close the window...

On that note.. Beware.. I cuss, I speak freely about my thoughts and the bad stuff that has happend in my life.. I post all those little things that I think should be shared and learned from.. I have a strange life.. I always have.. maybe it's how I just look at the world.. I need a laugh track and a soundtrack to really make my life complete... maybe then I'd be able to understand what's going on... maybe... at least I could hear the stalker music when it starts playing..

Anywho... I don't really focus on grammer.. Spellcheck is my best friend when it comes to typing on here.. but if you see a typo or HORRIBLE spelling error, it'd be nice if you let me know, so I didnt seem like Im writing like a 3 year old.. even tho, I proabbly still will even with your help.

and it begins...